When we ladies hit our 40s (or sometimes even earlier), we may find ourselves on what feels somewhat like a rollercoaster ride! Both physically and mentally, this period of life can bring about some big changes that can feel just a tad overwhelming.
Yes, we’re talking about the peri-menopause to menopause era.
During this time, many of us experience a wide range of unpleasant symptoms such as weight gain, loss of muscle mass, joint pain, fatigue, and the added struggle of mental health challenges such as increased ADHD, mood swings, anxiety, and even depression. It's a lot to onboard, so it’s fair to say that this stage of life can really knock us for six.
Then, of course, there’s the part we may want to ignore… that we’re simply getting older.
In my work, I talk a lot about personal change and how every shift in life can be seen as an opportunity to learn and to grow. Yet I also appreciate that when you’re in the thick of it, it’s tough to see this at the time.
Speaking both from a professional view and as someone in her early 40s, here are some key things I’d share with anyone embarking on or going through this hormonal journey…
// Understanding
There’s so much more awareness now about menopause and how it affects us, but a lot of us still struggle to truly understand what's happening in our bodies and to obtain this information to relate to it. Some women are struggling to even identify that something may be considerably wrong, brushing it aside and trying to keep going as usual.
If you're feeling unequipped and a little lost in all this, the first step is to educate yourself. Learn what’s going on physically, mentally, and dietary during this phase. There’s been a big push lately to spread awareness for both the peri and menopausal stages, and more events and resources are popping up. Be sure to take advantage of them! Attend workshops, read up, and talk to experts to get a handle on what’s happening to you. Knowledge is power, and understanding the changes in your body can make a huge difference in recognising and managing them.
// Acceptance
Once you know what’s going on, the next step is to accept it. I really do appreciate that this can be tough, but acceptance is the first step in actually addressing the changes you’re noticing.
On the other hand, this may seem an obvious move to make, yet recent studies show that many women still feel embarrassed or think they should just “push through” their symptoms.
Sometimes we deny what’s happening for all sorts of reasons, whether it’s because we want to keep up appearances, hate to feel we’re complaining, don’t want to admit we’re getting older, or we’re just plain stubborn (guilty!).
But ignoring the reality of what your body needs won’t help you either. You know your body better than anyone and if something feels different it’s important to listen and act. With so many changes impacting our mental health, bone density, and muscle strength, it’s essential to pay attention to these shifts so that we can make the right changes for our long-term well-being.
// Opportunity
Whilst this change may feel scary (as can any) it can also be an opportunity for growth, and there is always the potential to learn more about ourselves.
This is the perfect time to conduct yourself a little life audit. Consider some of the following… What are your passions? What gets you excited? Are you living in line with your values?
This kind of reflection can inspire new ideas. Maybe you’ll take up a hobby you’ve neglected or one that’s new, think up a new business venture, or focus on certain relationships whist choosing which ones are perhaps best left behind.
A lot of us also fear how these changes will affect our physical image. However again this can be an opportunity to get one step of such changes. Building muscle in your 40s onwards is crucial - not just for how you look, yet also for your overall long-term health. In addition, this time can also be a great chance to look at your personal style. Do your clothes represent the true you? Taking the parts of yourself and your style from over the years to create a look that represents the person you are now, whilst taking into account your style from over the years and making it suitable for you now.
// Inner Beauty
Over the years we’ve developed, evolved, grown, and gone through countless experiences which have shaped who we are. This is an incredible time to embrace every version of yourself and your identity.
Each stage of your life has given you your own learnings, strengths, resources, and possibly even traumas. Yet all of these have shaped the person you are now, are beautiful in their way and deserve to be carried forward.
A lot of folks talk about shedding your past identities. Instead, why not take them with you? Think of all the layers and depth to your character you have now. Every step has value and has contributed to your growth and to your journey. If one single step had been taken differently, you might not be the same person you are here today. Each piece is a part of your own personal story.
Embracing the woman you are now, knowing you are a compilation of all these beautiful versions and respecting every single one equips you with the kind of acceptance that allows you to move forward with grace and confidence.
And that’s where the real beauty lies. In owning all parts of your journey and allowing them to shape the best and most accomplished version of you yet.
This time comes with its challenges. Yet preparing yourself in the best way possible both mentally and physically can only come with its benefits.
Remember ladies, we’re all on the journey together too. Let’s support one another and embrace what lies ahead as one super-strong collective.
Who run the world?
// Carina Harvey, Founder | Carina Harvey Style & Identity Coach
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