What Women Really Want…For Valentines

by Irene Feeney Steele

“Dear Men, we don’t all want flowers (especially almost dead ones from a petrol station), cards, chocolates and red teddy bears for Valentine's.

Regards, Women”

I’m going out on a whim here by speaking for all women by saying – we all don’t want flowers and chocolates. I’m a practical kinda gal, I enjoy gifted items that last, out-of-the-blue, simple (and free) gestures, experiences that I can treasure forever and memorable materialistic items that I can savour and enjoy from time to time. I’d actually love a day to myself, a me-day, where the husband takes the kids and I immerse myself in a day of peace, sleep and tranquillity. This may seem quite ungrateful but if I’m given chocolates, they’re devoured in one go, that Valentines' card is usually binned after a few days plus those flowers…are dead within a week. In the words of Miley Cyrus…”I can buy MYSELF flowers!”

Again…I know, I sound like the most ungrateful wench and I totally know it’s the thought that counts but as empowered women, in 2023…I think most of us are bored with the whole Valentine's Day gift cliché. Valentine'sFor example, a man’s definition of ‘romantic’ can sometimes feel miles away from what a woman really wants. Case in point – lingerie. No, I do not want the itiest-bitiest, lacy, more holes than a golf course and string for knickers lingerie set. If it is underwear, I’d prefer a comfy, luxurious, (bonus points if it’s sustainable!), good quality set (preferably SKIMS) that makes me feel good (even more bonus points if it's shapewear) and which I can wear often.

Interestingly, statistics reveal that many of the little things that mean a lot to both men and women in a relationship – are free. It isn’t expensive gifts that impress the most, but affectionate and caring gestures. Simple gestures like taking the kids for an afternoon while you enjoy a bath or go shopping on your own, hand-written romantic notes, spending quality time with each other, without a smartphone, where you talk and enjoy each other’s company, going on a hike, surprising you with a home cooked meal or coming home with a cute bunch of flowers (that’s not on Valentines Day!) goes a very long way. In saying all of this, I also wouldn’t say no to being whisked away somewhere. To be told to ‘pack your bags’ and have everything planned where I just ‘show up’ is probably my dream Valentine's gift scenario – although I would like to know about the weather so my inner OCD can ensure I have the correct outfits packed accordingly.

(I’ll make sure to somehow accidentally send this article to my husband’s inbox – they all need hints…right?!).

To add… we women are diverse. A Valentines Day gift that sounds heavenly to one lady might sound complete “meh” to another. There is no perfect Valentine's Day gift that will satisfy everyone. It goes without saying though when a gift or event/experience is purchased or carefully planned with sincerity and consideration for the other person, it’s guaranteed to be very much appreciated.

Lastly…and this is a message to my own husband -

…if all else fails, just get me a voucher!